Awareness

i have been realizing for quite sometime now, that if i have a prolonged period of good times, i will crash at some point, and i need the low point from this crash, because it is this low point that will allow me to experience good times again.

The fact that I can't sustain a good time forever, because i can't consistently remain as a person who can experience a good time, has made me wary of good times. Whenever i feel good for too long, at the back of my mind, i will start anticipating a crash.

I suppose the reason why this might be a case, is because joy and distress might be related to the person who we think we are going to be, not the person we are.

If we feel like we are better today than yesterday and tomorrow, we are going to better, we will feel good, and if we continuously feel this way, we might even feel euphoric, but we can't sustain this elevation forever, because there might be a ceiling to how high we can go in the human experience. Once we get too high, we will be given to crash, simply because we can go no higher, and because we might need the crash to experience another episode of elevation in the future.

I don't think we are aware that we constantly need to be someone more than who we are or someone other than who we are. I wonder what will happen if we possess this awareness. Will we cease desiring wanting to be someone more than or other than who we are? Or will we be able to transcend the limit of the human experience, and enter a whole new dimension of high, that surpasses anything we have experienced before?